Second babies and beyond

Contributed by Canice Lim, currently a student who enjoys connecting with people through writing

The dawning of the 21st century has seen few of the Y2K generation with many siblings. In the past, families used to be big, with some having ten or more siblings. However, couples these days have at most three or less children.

Perhaps it is time to take a few moments to pause and think why is this so? For those couples with only one or two children, have you ever wondered what the best gift which you can offer to your child? The best gift that you might give is actually to give him or her, a sibling. By having more children, you add joy to the family. After all, is it not a common saying that ‘the more the merrier’?

By introducing a younger sibling to your child, you have given him, a best companion for life, without realizing it. You also do not need to worry about getting a playmate for your children, especially if both parents are working. In the long run, the older child will learn to take up responsibilities and to be a leader as he takes care of his younger siblings. The children will also be instilled with the virtues of sharing and empathy as the natural environment at home encourages them to cooperate and to work together in harmony. Hence, having two or more children also nurture them into excellent future team players!

As your children grow, there will come a time when they might become more rebellious, as they turn into teenagers. It is also at this stage that they begin to turn to their friends and heed less of their parents’ advice. Here is where siblings play an important role. They become each other’s confidante and also unconsciously act as mediators between you (parents) and the child if there are any pressing issues which cannot be discussed outright immediately. Moreover, apart from parents, siblings are unofficial counselors and source of unwavering support: they stand by each other through their heartbreaks, their crushes, their disappointments over their academic grades and especially when they are at their crossroads, faced with an important decision to make with regards to their future.

Some of you might worry: what about sibling rivalry? Here comes an important skill that will equip the children in society as well. This skill is called compromising. To be able to reach an agreement mutually, to resolve disputes peacefully and to learn how to ‘give and take’; these are valuable skills that are needed to excel in society.

In conclusion, by having second babies and more, parents have created a natural and conducive environment to nurture the characters of your children. Your family becomes the first ground where the child learns what is love, what is harmony, what is sharing, what is empathy, what it means to ‘look out for one another’. Indeed, not every woman is blessed with the gift to bear children. For those who have been given this gift, may you be blest with much joy.